In my class today was a smart boy who was about two years old. Mid way into the lesson, I needed to relocate him to another part of the class. He was standing beside his sister when I spotted him. My understanding was that the two other children sitting next to where he was standing were also his siblings. The boy was therefore not comfortable with my relocation move, but he needed to be with his age mates.
When he understood my intention, the boy withdrew in defiance, took a few steps backwards and clung to one of his siblings. I walked towards him saying calmly, firmly and faithfully, “You have to obey my instruction.” His eyes were misty by the time I got to where he was standing. I held his hands and told him that I had a good sit for him in front of the class. He followed me reluctantly.
I kept observing him. Few minutes after he was repositioned, his misty eyes cleared and his mood became brighter. He became happy with his age mates who sat close him. Before the class was concluded, I announced that the children in my class were smart and obedient, especially the boy who was relocated. I told him to stand up for applause because he obeyed an instruction even though he preferred to sit with his siblings.
That boy finally made my day when he turned towards me and gave me a hug at the stair case after the Sunday school class.
I was encouraged by this experience. I, however, imagined other approaches people may adopt in similar situations.
- Immediately threaten him with all sorts of punishment and frighten him into obedience.
- Jerk him up without saying a word and reposition him forcefully.
For these two options, the boy might not have just had misty eyes, he might have cried for a longer period, not benefiting from the class. If he had cried, the class would have been distracted, especially his siblings. Also, he would have missed out on the positive impact of his being able to obey that instruction willingly and sorting out his emotions.
Effective parenting skills aim at raising children who have self discipline and are well developed intellectually, socially, emotionally and physically.
-Uchenna N. Nduka