The brace of endless love is a parent with an unshakable resolve to continuously remain supportive to all aspects of the child’s development until the child develops into a disciplined adult. This therefore implies that a great parent is always close enough to observe and evaluate a child’s opinion, behaviour and contribution on all issues of life as a feedback for proper follow up. A parent’s feelings, opinion, commendation or reservation about a child’s behaviour must necessarily be properly and effectively communicated to provide guidance for proper development of the child. Criticism is therefore an essential instrument in a healthy parenting process.
If properly applied in its pure form, criticism is constructive otherwise, it can be destructive.The following contrasts are noteworthy.
| Healthy Criticism (Pure) | Unhealthy Criticism (Impure) | |
| 1 | Communication is interactive | Communication is overbearing |
| 2 | It is done hopefully and faithfully | It is done with despair. |
| 3 | It is done with self-control. | Communication is clogged with manifestation of negative emotions. |
| 4 | Expectation of the parent from the child is realistic and corresponds with the child’s ability. | Parent’s expectation from the child is unrealistic |
| 5 | The parent patiently explains a better approach or process in the language the child will understand | Parents have little or no time for detailed explanation. |
| 6 | It does not condemn the child. The wrong action is condemned. | The child is condemned and described with negative words. |
| 7 | It recognises that every child is unique and lives a space for the unique and positive expression of the child’s unique personality disposition. | It expects every child to fit into the same personality mold. |
| 8 | It does not withhold praise or commendation when it is earned. | It criticises almost everything the child does. |
| 9 | Achieves great parenting results with disciplined children. | Creates resentment and rebellion. The child’s situation usually worsens. |
A parent’s ability to handle the instrument of criticism can make or mar a child’s future. Great parents criticise wisely for proper mental, social, physical and spiritual development of their children.
-Uchenna N. Nduka
